Talk the Talk? NOT IN THIS LIFE.
I speak a lot, when I have a pen and a paper, or say I love to put forth my ideas through the keyboard into the virtual notepad. That is my happy space!
But then world happens, people happen, extroverts happen, and say hello to chaos. Adding to the very long list, I also (and of course) suck at socializing. You would understand how hard my life has been if I told you that college hit me like a truck for I had no friends accompanying me. Now at this point I'm totally confused as to what kind of feeling I need to have towards my best friends. It's like you make me want to believe that you're the best-est company I could ever have, make me so resistant to even try getting along with new counterparts and then almost kill me by choosing another stream in +1 so that after school ends I'm almost dead for not being able to find you into the same building anymore.
And with due course of tragic events, I'm mostly surrounded by curious extroverts who are always up to poke my solace, "Why don't you speak? Why are you so quiet?", sometimes also "I'm sorry but do you have an attitude problem?" (people love this fancy 'attitude' word). "No I'm quietly planning a murder, and you seem pretty fit for my next victim."
I really wonder when am I gonna learn to fit in so easily like everybody else around. No really 'cause people out there have amazing social skills. You see it was probably the second week of college, and the cohesiveness had already been attained, like wtf! You've just met this person, how can you be best friends for life?! Because we're past a semester and I'm still there, analyzing everyone, and I've reached nowhere while people have already built homes together (believe me they did).
I try, I really try to gel along, and I do to some extent, but then the clock strikes 3 pm, and I go back home, put off the 'clingy', 'friendly', 'likeable', and 'sugar-puking' temporary traits to the very swanky 'negligent' and 'socially-awkward' ME!
p.s. Not that it's an all-bad experience,but this is me just being me. :p
But then world happens, people happen, extroverts happen, and say hello to chaos. Adding to the very long list, I also (and of course) suck at socializing. You would understand how hard my life has been if I told you that college hit me like a truck for I had no friends accompanying me. Now at this point I'm totally confused as to what kind of feeling I need to have towards my best friends. It's like you make me want to believe that you're the best-est company I could ever have, make me so resistant to even try getting along with new counterparts and then almost kill me by choosing another stream in +1 so that after school ends I'm almost dead for not being able to find you into the same building anymore.
And with due course of tragic events, I'm mostly surrounded by curious extroverts who are always up to poke my solace, "Why don't you speak? Why are you so quiet?", sometimes also "I'm sorry but do you have an attitude problem?" (people love this fancy 'attitude' word). "No I'm quietly planning a murder, and you seem pretty fit for my next victim."
I really wonder when am I gonna learn to fit in so easily like everybody else around. No really 'cause people out there have amazing social skills. You see it was probably the second week of college, and the cohesiveness had already been attained, like wtf! You've just met this person, how can you be best friends for life?! Because we're past a semester and I'm still there, analyzing everyone, and I've reached nowhere while people have already built homes together (believe me they did).
I try, I really try to gel along, and I do to some extent, but then the clock strikes 3 pm, and I go back home, put off the 'clingy', 'friendly', 'likeable', and 'sugar-puking' temporary traits to the very swanky 'negligent' and 'socially-awkward' ME!
p.s. Not that it's an all-bad experience,but this is me just being me. :p
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